A BUS POEM

When you do not want anybody
to sit next to you
on the bus. Sit in the aisle
seat. It is important
you do not place your bag
on the empty
window chair. You are not a rude man.
If challenged,
say you have a bad knee
and shift. They must feel
pretty shitty about this. They do not have to know
it was your other leg. Just hurt.
A hot young guy gets on the bus.
This changes things. Shuffle across, smile
and leave a thigh
for him to sit against. If that woman
in the purple fleece
gets high nosed about it. Fuck her.
You had a miracle.
Who is she to argue with it?

REMINDER

The outstanding balance on your electricity account

is £36.17. We got in touch recently

to remind you that your bill hasn't been paid yet.

If you have paid it in the last 7 days,

thank you. There's no need to contact us.

If you haven't please pay now. Have a look at the back

of this reminder for easy ways to pay.

If you don't pay or contact us within 7 days

we may pass your details to our debt recovery team.

They may arrange for an agent to contact

you and visit your home. If they do this we'll need to 
add the costs onto the amount you already

owe us. We may also share this information

with a credit reference agency 
and this could affect your ability to obtain credit 
in the future.

If you're finding it difficult

to pay please tell us as soon as you receive your bill.

Our customer services teams are trained

to offer you advice in a sympatheic, sensitive way

and to help you choose the best way of paying

for your energy.

We'd love to supply your energy again in the future!

We can supply your gas and electricity,

wherever you live in the country. Just call us

or go online to www.npower.com, we'll be happy

to help! Npower is a registered trademark

and trading name of Npower Yorkshire Limited

(Registered No. 3937808) who also act as an agent

for Npower Yorkshire Supply Limited (Registered No. 4212116)

FRUIT LIFE

for J M–G

I was an ugli fruit. I was a miracle berry.
I was a banana. I became a watermelon.
If the gooseberries are bitching, I become
a grape, a satsuma or an orange, a pear.

When my mother asks why, I reply plum
and kumquat. A punnet of strawberries,
blackberries bursting from thorns.
These are my fruit lies, my pineapples

on the window sill, shouldered by Lemon
Zest Morning Fresh and scouring pads.
I am a mango, a kiwi, a papaya, tomatoes
and you will not juice me until I am ripe. 



This poem was commissioned for charity. You too can commission here
http://www.justgiving.com/Gavin-Hudson1