HOW WILL I AFFORD TO BUY A PLACE OF MY OWN?

19/03/2015

for IC

Mainly minor: in your hands
Pentacles: Earth, money

Delay all plans,
because
there are hidden obs-
tacles
or enemies. Be
discrete.

A sensible, matron-
ly woman
who has a good
head
for business. Kind-
hearted
and charitable, she also
has a taste
for luxury. Sometimes
moody
her general person-
ality
is very caring.

This is the worst card in the pack.
Betrayed,
lost, cold and love-
less this card
shows the lowest
point in fortune.
However, since this is
the worst it can
get,
improvements must surely follow.
The only
way
from here is
up!

A conscientious
person, thrifty
and capable.
Someone who has little
money
but splendid
prospects.
A student with a sense of duty.
A patient
person. Also
there may be good
news
about money.

Miserly attitudes, a grasping
mentality. Avarice, dis-
content
and envy of
others.

Difficult circums-
tances, yet you
will gain more than you have
lost. An unhappy
time will
soon
end.

HOW WILL THE RESULT OF THE GENERAL ELECTION AFFECT ME?

19/03/2015

for GH
Mainly minor: in your hands

Miserly attitudes, a grasping

mentality.

Avarice,  discontent

and envy of others.

Quarrels,

competing interests,

unfortunate combinations

of events

and people. Corruption

and domestic strife.

You may be taken advantage

of: subversion,

hidden enemies. Attempts

will be made

to disrupt your plans.

Bankruptcy

or other great loss

which could

have been avoided. A rapid

change of attitude

to money is now

needed.

Don’t be afraid to leave

the past

behind. Travel.

There is plenty more in the world

to see and experience. If

you are disillusioned with your life

now, take heart

because the future promises

to be brighter. Follow

your heart and do

what you truly desire.

Frustration,

which you take out on

others. Being

your own worst enemy,

placing restrictions

upon yourself.

HEREDITARY PREDISPOSITION

genome twists the 

follicle makes the 

melatonin whitens the 

balance falters the 

heart quickens the 

life shrivels the 

penis squirms the 

scrotum tightens the 

diaphragm hiccups the 

hand grasps the

INTEMPERANCE AND BUSINESS TROUBLE

In The City, sunlight turns the air to melted ice-cream
sending city bankers to the ale house for their lunch
to souse the fires with Staropramen. Thermometers pop
at the sound of the trading bell and seeping buboes 
weep in the underarms of short sleeved linen shirts.

This one, three sheets gone, makes a gamble he can drink
the afternoon dry. The afternoon responds with rain.

REMINDER

The outstanding balance on your electricity account

is £36.17. We got in touch recently

to remind you that your bill hasn't been paid yet.

If you have paid it in the last 7 days,

thank you. There's no need to contact us.

If you haven't please pay now. Have a look at the back

of this reminder for easy ways to pay.

If you don't pay or contact us within 7 days

we may pass your details to our debt recovery team.

They may arrange for an agent to contact

you and visit your home. If they do this we'll need to 
add the costs onto the amount you already

owe us. We may also share this information

with a credit reference agency 
and this could affect your ability to obtain credit 
in the future.

If you're finding it difficult

to pay please tell us as soon as you receive your bill.

Our customer services teams are trained

to offer you advice in a sympatheic, sensitive way

and to help you choose the best way of paying

for your energy.

We'd love to supply your energy again in the future!

We can supply your gas and electricity,

wherever you live in the country. Just call us

or go online to www.npower.com, we'll be happy

to help! Npower is a registered trademark

and trading name of Npower Yorkshire Limited

(Registered No. 3937808) who also act as an agent

for Npower Yorkshire Supply Limited (Registered No. 4212116)

THREE LITTLE PIGS

First we lived in a house of bricks

and the wolf was the landlord

and the wolf came

and blew the bricks in.

Then we lived in a house of sticks

and the wolf was the landlord

and the wolf came

and blew the sticks in.

Then we lived in a house of straw

and the wolf was the landlord

and the wolf came

and blew the straw in.

Then we lived in the roads and streets

and the wolf was the landlord

and the wolf came

and blew us all in.

This was partly inspired by part of this interview with Owen Jones: click here to view

Listen to the songified version: here

AMIS SHRUGGED

for JB

New York was flickering out like a faulty light,
and the skyline was tapering out like the fuse
fizzles on the opening credits to Mission Impossible.

Should you choose to accept it, even the Statue
of Liberty crooked her right arm and dropped
her torch in ocean, where it splashed and sizzled.

Simmering. The great beast in shutdown heaved
it haunches up under itself to winter it out.
The cash registers were done with singing.

On television in a bar where the neon still burned,
the English Professor was sighing his opinion
to the anchor in London who asked one more question.

Amis shrugged. And the world began to run
like peas on the deck of The Titanic. It tilted, 
gaining momentum as it broke and buried them.

DECKCHAIRS AND FLOWERPOTS

for SF

On the Titanic the deckchairs were shifted

to let the women and children through

to the lifeboats that waited on the upper decks.

It reminds me of the flowerpot I pushed

from an upstairs window on the head of a Bradford

millionaire. His bowler was dinted like fuck.

TSUNAMI

for RB

It came out of the sky and over the tops of buildings and up

out the sewers and smashed into windows and doors. A bailiff

that swept away families, spilled into gutters, collecting their debris —

a pushchair, a repossessed car, a settee, cutlery, carpets —

ripped off the floorboards, the walls, bare concrete and broken

to fists of rubble. A rising onrush of misery; batons and helmets,

a crash of riot shields thundering inland and northwards.

Some say the levees were purposefully weakened, that sluice gates

had not undergone the mandatory checks, flood defence budgets

were cut. Four years of waters continuing to rise, it's swim or die

or be eaten by the sharks, contract dysentery or starve or buy a speedboat.

BAD POTATO WEATHER

The nightjars are blacking the sun out
with rainclouds of feather. Poor scratching
in the waterlogged soil for lungworm
and beetle. The potassium's peaking
round mid-afternoon, making sailors afraid
of lithium in spinach barrels. Flood warning
by dawn. This is bad potato weather. The kind
to sink dormice and make millionaires 
of stoats. In ferns, toads burp at frogs spawning
in rivers that burst, coursing new valleys
of acid erosion. Stone turns to leek in the riptides.