THINGS YOU START DOING WHEN YOU START EATING FISH

You start going to the cinema on your own after work.
You get your haircut.
You stop spending so much.
You get more energy and become less sociable.
Sex is not something you want to do as often
You only want to sleep with Japanese men.
You refer to yourself in the second person.
Seven years of your life are partially erased.
You feel like your left kidney always has a water infection.
You begin to masterbate more frequently
Never have you felt so depressed about how happy you are.
You welcome new bacteria like friends or long dead relatives.
You want to move on and you know it.
You worry you might lose your job.
You notice that 8 pm feels more like 6 pm.
Light nights make you want to go running.
You never go running again ever.
You eat more food poached and less fried.
You lack the stamina for post-modernism.
You think about the country India more than the country British Guyana.
Over complicated relationships bore you.
People in overcomplicated relationships bore you.
You have never been more miserable.
You have a sense that someone else is dressed as you.
You work in an office that is too hot.
You forget your lines.